I need a cashmere hug

I don't know.. I don't like feeling torn like this. My idealist self isn't talking to me anymore.

What do I want?

Apart from gentleness.

And if I'm not getting any of that, I can't be that selfish anymore to just say "That's it, I'm looking elsewhere."

I can't seem to bloody stop this. I can't stop thinking. Of you. I know you think differently for this matter. But I can't seem to even stop it.. it's like trying to cut off a stream. You can block it momentarily, then it'll just overflow and flood the world and we will all drown woo hoo~ You make me laugh. Omfg and why does it feel so right.

I seem to be coming up with ways to try to go around it. Why do I always have to try to be the better person?

Currently listening to: Jay Chou - Yi Lu Xiang Bei