It's not that easy anymore

If I were to write out a suicide note now, it would start off with the words "I'm sorry".

Endless lines of sorrow apologies.

To her, I'm sorry I broke my promise. I'm sorry you can't be proud of me. I'm sorry I didn't turn out the way you wanted me to. I'm sorry I can't be perfect.

To him, I'm sorry I'm far from what you expected me to turn out to be. I'm sorry there are things you don't know.

To her, I'm sorry I didn't give you my jeans when you asked whether you could have them - I should've. I'm sorry I didn't spend as much time with you as I should've.

To her, I'm sorry I didn't call you often enough. I'm sorry I didn't send you the card earlier. I'm sorry I didn't do more when I saw you for the last time. I'm sorry I didn't get to talk to you for the last time.

To her, I'm sorry there are things I keep from you. I'm sorry I get upset sometimes. I'm sorry I get mood swings sometimes.

To him, I'm sorry if I'm wrong. I'm sorry everytime I upset you. I'm sorry I'm judgemental sometimes. I'm sorry for being picky. I'm sorry for being a pain.

To him, I'm sorry about the way things are now. I'm sorry I'm so soft sometimes. I'm sorry I'm so vulnerable. I'm sorry I give you hope sometimes. I'm sorry we can't go back.

To him, I'm sorry I've let you down again. I'm sorry for the way I am. I'm sorry for the things I did and the things I'm doing.

To her, I'm sorry I didn't spend enough time with you. I'm sorry I don't spend enough time with you.

To him, I'm sorry for all the hurt I've caused. I'm sorry I'm so indecisive. I'm sorry I had to drag you down with me. I'm sorry for all of your time I've wasted.

To her, I'm sorry I don't like you.

To him, I'm sorry we aren't as close as we were before. I'm sorry I let things come between us.

To him, I'm sorry for the tears I made you cry.

To myself, I'm sorry I've let you down.

Currently listening to: Guy Sebastian - Angels Brought Me Here